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| Monday, July 26, 2010 |
| The Mood |
Emotion: Do you ever feel just at a total loss of self-worth? That things are becoming unraveled so quickly? Today, I had a bad case of the Monday Blues. I suppose much of it is just being a woman. I find that part of me revolting sometimes. It can be dramatic and not one person I know loves drama. We (women) have tendencies towards drama. It's really due to our scientific and inherent hormonal nature. Most of the time, I loathe this part of being a woman.
Today, however, I'm finding God is working in me. I found myself quite lonely. I constantly sought God to help me with this, but kept sinking further and further into disappointment. I became quite distraught. Even as I write this, I am not feeling so fulfilled. But God allowed me to become lonely today. He stripped my life of all of my social networks and revealed my naked self today. I could only go to Him. He was the only one who was listening. So how can I feel like I am alone? Especially when He heals the brokenhearted and binds my wounds.
This life is hard sometimes. Really hard.Labels: Emotions |
posted by Sommer @ 8:46 PM   |
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| Friday, July 9, 2010 |
| The Lotus Flower |
Vision: (@ TNG 07.06.10) During worship, I envisioned a tiny angel that glowed so brightly you could only see wings fluttering in a gold light. As I came closer to it, its wings became lotus flower petals and I saw a bright white lotus flower floating in a small pond. It was definitely an ecosystem similar to a Japanese garden, as I saw a pagoda-like building in the background reflecting off the water.
I had no real conclusion to this vision. Others in the group suggested it might be a word for myself. I did not know what the lotus flower meant and they seemed to think it meant peace...that peace is what God wants for me. So, of course, in my quest for a satisfying ending, I researched this further and found many meanings, all of which I will pray for the right one to shine through. Perhaps, it is all three. (These, I felt, were VERY interesting for me.)
- I found the Chinese use the lotus flower to symbolize perseverance through difficult times. The lotus flower grows up out of the thick, dark mud, and through murky waters to triumphantly sit atop the water brilliantly radiating its white purity. No matter what happens in life, beauty and light will always come from the darkness.
- (1) Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, (2) through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. (3) Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; (4) perseverance, character; and character, hope. (5) And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us. - Romans 5:1-5
- (10) Feed the hungry and help those in trouble. Then your light will shine out of the darkness and the darkness around you will be as bright as noon. - Isaiah 58:10
- Another analogy is associated with the stalk of the flower. It is easily bendable, but very hard to break because of how fibrous it is. This symbolizes the unbreakable bond between two people or family members to the point that not even distance can separate them in heart. (I like this one!)
- May the Lord be loyal to you in return and reward you with his unfailing love! And I, too, will reward you for what you have done. - 2 Samuel 2:6
- (13) Three things will last forever - faith, hope, and love - and the greatest of these is love. - 1 Corinthians 13:1
- In Buddhism, the lotus flower represents faithfulness, purity, and enlightenment, which are achieved through endurance. The lotus flower only blooms for three days and then the petals drop one by one into the water. Finally, the seed falls down into the murky depths. Seeds are known to last a very long time. The Chinese have planted 1,200-year-old seeds and they have been cultivated into new life.
- He guards the paths of the just and protects those who are faithful to him. - Proverbs 2:8
- (4)For it is impossible to bring back to repentance those who were once enlightened—those who have experienced the good things of heaven and shared in the Holy Spirit, (5) who have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the power of the age to come— (6) and who then turn away from God. - Hebrews 6:4-6
All of these explanations of the meaning of the lotus flower mean something to me. They all represent some part of me. I pray the Lord reveals more to me. Over the last year, I have changed. Though I changed a lot 7 years ago, a big part of me has changed just within this last year. Coming to the realization and being comfortable with it in a world of influences has been a struggle.
I am yours, God, and nobody elses. I am so very thankful that You show me Your ways through my own little looking glass. You knitted me in my mother's womb and know how I am wired. My gratefulness can not be said in words for all of the good and bad in my life that You allow to happen. My faith is restored and my strength unfailing in this very moment. Praise You, my Father in Heaven. Rain down on me Your grace and mercy. Amen.Labels: visions |
| posted by Sommer @ 10:47 PM |
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| Wednesday, June 30, 2010 |
| The Circus Tent |
Vision: (@ TNG 06.29.10) During worship, I saw a tent pole holding up a large tent, such as that at a circus. I recognized the ropes radiating from the top of the tent pole supporting the canvas above it. I felt this was not only a personal message, but a message for all of us. It was an affirmation of God's love and support. It seems all of us in the group are going through interesting changes in our lives. Big changes. Not just little changes like diets and clothes.
God desires us to seek Him out. He is jealous for us. He often challenges us in life in order to draw us near. I truly believe that. I felt the tent pole was God and as long as we kept our challenges and changing lives underneath the shelter of His tent, we will all be okay and He will be there to help us along. He covers us in all of our pain, sin, and all around hard times. HE covers us and nothing else. God wants your attention. He longs for your heart just as we long for His.
Over the last day, this message has been continually repeated to me. Take 5 minutes today and share your time with Him. I promise...it will be worth it. |
| posted by Sommer @ 11:40 PM |
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| Wednesday, June 23, 2010 |
| The Deep Sea Anemone |
Vision: (@ TNG 06.22.10) We asked God to come and listen to our prayers for each other. As we prayed, I saw a most beautiful sea anemone glowing in the vast darkness of the deep sea. It's tentacles waved so effortlessly in space. It was feather-like in appearance. Though darkness surrounded the animal, it was bright with bioluminescence and little bits of food sprinkled down around it like snow. The sea anemone catches its food with its tentacles and it travels down to the top of the animal where the mouth is located. I felt there was a passage that explained part of this vision so perfectly:
Ephesians 5:8-14 8For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light 9(for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) 10and find out what pleases the Lord. 11Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. 12For it is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. 13But everything exposed by the light becomes visible, 14for it is light that makes everything visible. This is why it is said: "Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you." Continuing to press into this word, I found the pieces of food to be seen because these represent the little pieces of knowledge that God illuminates for us to gather and absorb in the same fashion a sea anemone eats. He wants us to fill up on His knowledge...He yearns for us to know Him more.
I am in complete awe of the Lord, His passion for us, and His neverending love. I praise Him for the gifts He has bestowed upon me and I certainly see He has many plans for those in our group and our church. Labels: visions |
| posted by Sommer @ 10:18 PM |
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| Tuesday, May 11, 2010 |
| The Diamond |
| Vision: (@ TNG 05.11.10) While worshiping and praying, I saw a geometric spade followed by a spinning diamond. I am still trying to figure this one out. |
| posted by Sommer @ 10:42 PM |
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| Thursday, February 18, 2010 |
| The Bonnet, The Fire, & The Dance Update |
| Update: I have grown into the bonnet. :) I have now been living alone (with my kids) for 15 months. I have had my ups and downs. I am not sure what this year will bring, but I am positive if I can make it til the end of February, I'll be good! It's been difficult, yes. But mostly financially and because of that, I have had to work a lot at home causing the kids to miss me. It puts a bit of a strain on the home life. But we are making through the grace of God & I can't wait to see what this year has in store! |
| posted by Sommer @ 9:30 AM |
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| Sunday, March 8, 2009 |
| The Bonnet, The Fire, & The Dance |
Vision (for me): (@ HVC formerly VCF 03.08.09) I was told today that a word was given to this person earlier in the week. I went up for prayer & that person was praying for me. The vision was of a giant bonnet as big as a house standing upright & open. Out pouring from it were all things of womanhood. During prayer, they had another vision of a string of fire that burned strong. After all that, I was told another vision was given to someone for me. That of the dance scene in Get Smart. :)
Conclusion: I asked for strength during prayer. The bonnet reaffirmed my position as a dominant female in my household. I am now alone for the first time in 10 months really. Before that, I had only been alone for a few months. Never before have I ever been alone. I have my children, but as an adult, I've always been in a house with at least one other. Things can be very overwhelming as a single mother. I felt God was trying to encourage me as a mother & head of my household & remind me that I am never alone. The fire was something else I have been praying about. Motivation. I need the fire put in my heart again to accomplish all I want/need to. The dance was God's desire to show what we can do together to the world.
Labels: visions |
| posted by Sommer @ 9:47 PM |
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